I'm thinking I should get it out.

 

Please Just Let Me Lose Composure For Now

Dear readers, (I'd like to pretend there are actually people reading this ! Haha)

I know right, it's been awhile since the last post. Just so y'know, I've been working relatively hard this two weeks I must say. I know that it's not the best that I'm capable of though.

I know that I can and I need to be working even harder than this, but sometimes I'm hindered by my kindness.

Weird? Not really.At least i thought so myself.

 Oh don't get me wrong though,I'm not to boast & brag that I'm kind. In fact, I'm not really a fan of boasting.So yeah,whatever.

It's not good I know, But doooooodee...It is not like I can help it and I think it is better than not bothering about how others feel as long as you get what you want right?

Though I know, it's like that in the real world, but hey, if the world's like this, doesn't mean I have to be.

Secondly, just a random question, why are there mood swings?

It's annoying.

I was obviously happy this morning & afternoon.
Nothing bad happened to me today.
In fact today is actually pretty good, despite the fact that I was having this headache and stomach pain.

But that's not really a big deal,I thought to myself and it didn't affect me pretty much at first.

One of my friends even asked me why is it that I'm so happy today cause it's scaring them.

PAUSE ....

Huh? o.O

( That's weird, cause back in my old school, me being NOT HAPPY scares my friends. Me being HAPPY DO NOT scare them at all. )

RESUME ►

I was happy even as I was walking back from campus after the test.
I was STILL happy when I reached the room.
I was STILL happy when I turned on the lappy.
BUT right after I sat down for awhile, I became miserable.
I seriously don't know why.
So I went to sleep to try and get rid of the frustration.
Apparently, I didn't wanna get out of bed when I was already awake.
I've been trying to figure out for the past hours, what is it that made me feel so frustrated SUDDENLY without any reason whatsoever, I repeat, SUDDENLY!.
I can't understand why I'm so miserable right now.
maybe I'm still holding grudge against someone without me realizing.
maybe I'm miserable at the fact that I have heaps of homework to do.
maybe I'm so miserable that I have heaps of revisions to do.

Ahhhh, all this doesn't make sense can!

WHY IS IT THAT I AM I FRUSTRATED RIGHT NOW!
I feel like hitting someone really badly...
I feel like tearing up someone..(that sounds really scary,yes?)
STILL, IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!
Now, I don't feel like doing my homework.
I don't feel like doing anything at all.
I don't feel like myself anymore.
I GOT TONES TO DO!

I guess,

I'll Erase Everything.

Reset, Reset

Okay,

I'm blissful ♥

Still.

xoxo.